Monday, May 3, 2010

One size fits all???

Seriously? Who created this concept?

If you're a woman, you know what I mean. You buy an article of clothing- a shirt, a jacket, a wrap, socks... and it's OSFA. Then you realize.

You're not an "all."

Or perhaps you see it in your infant's clothing. The size says 6-9 months, and you can't even get the thing over their big ol' bobble head. Yet another outift in the same size completely swallows them like Jonah's whale.

All-in-ones, all-inclusives, and one-size-fits-alls don't work for clothing, tastes, preferences...

Or children.

Can I be brief and super blunt today? (yes, just today... believe it or not, sometimes I taper my bluntness...) STOP MEASURING YOUR CHILD AGAINST OTHER CHILDREN!

Are you familiar with the feeling when your friends' kids are doing things like solving quadratic equations or reciting every vice-president we've ever had, and your kid is the one sitting in the corner of the room sticking his toe in his left nostril? Or maybe other kids are thinking of going to college to be a lawyer or to learn something useful like astrophysics, and your little Einstein has goals to work at a Texaco station?

Be of good cheer.

Your child is unique! Doesn't make you feel any better? I didn't think so.

Listen for a minute.

My sister and I cannot be ANY more opposite from each other. I was a brainiac in school. I loved everything about it. I loved research papers, book reports, homework, and exams. However, I HATED sports, getting hot and sweaty, and competition of any sort. My sister was done with school after the first week of kindergarten. She HATED school work, HATED homework, and HATED sitting in a classroom for hours everyday. She played all kinds of sports, had her teeth knocked out, and is the most competitive girl you'll meet. I cannot sew to save my life. She actually just opened a business making designer hair accessories. I cannot paint, draw, or color. She can spend hours on end coloring and even painted a tree on the wall of her living room that looks like it belongs in an IKEA magazine.

Did my parents freak out because by 5th grade, my sister wasn't reading on a college level like I was? Nope. Did they panic because I never played a sport in my life? Nope. They knew they had two girls who were total opposites.

And they were ok with that.

When I was pregnant with Abi, a few of my friends had babies around the same time. Of course as a new mom, you measure your child against every one else, looking for a glimpse of hope that somehow, your kid shines in areas others don't. At first it freaked me out that most of her baby friends were running around in the nursery, while Abi sat in one spot the whole time. But then I realized she was talking in complete sentences when they weren't. Her friends would be climbing on things, jumping off things, and there she'd sit. Chatting away, barking orders at everyone as they played around her.

And you know what? That child to this day has no athletic abilites (that we can see). She has the funniest run ever. She has a hard time consistently catching a ball. I think it's safe to say that she's not going to be the star of a Little League summer season. But you know what she WILL be the star of?

Every class she's ever in for the rest of her life. Her ability to make others feel like they are the only person in the room is almost supernatural. Kids are attracted to her like she's a living, breathing cartoon. She can sing like an angel. She expresses her heart by dancing. She writes us love letters on a daily basis.

We decided early on that the only standards we would measure her by are our family standards, and the standards God has outlined for her in His Word. His standards ARE one-size-fits-all. So, really, moms and dads... look at your friend's kid with the IQ of 562 and appreciate him... But take bigger notice of YOUR miracle.

Why do we think we have to have perfect children anyway? It's not possible! We are their parents, after all...

Kinda takes the pressure off a little, doesn't it?


  1. This is one of your best posts ever!

  2. Hahahahaha! Your second to last paragraph was golden delicious good. Great post, dearest friend. As always.