Monday, March 15, 2010

Feelin' the love.

Indulge me a moment, will you?

Confession- I'm feelin' mushy. I've had several great days with Abi (meaning neither she or I have had any meltdowns). I'm seeing such growth in her in so many ways, and the ooey gooey feelings are overflowing today for her. Granted, they may disappear in a flash if she comes running in with something glued or painted onto her skin, a missing Pluffie Puff (her sleep animal), or a clothes crisis of some sort. So, while I'm in this happy place, I thought I'd make a list. (Here I go with lists again...) This is for my sake, so I can look back on it tomorrow or next Tuesday, when the bubble pops and new issues to deal with arise. This is also for you... to hopefully spur you to make your own list of sorts.

I'll call it

Kisses on demand.
Having the best shopping buddy ever, all the time. (I trained her from birth!)
An art gallery, full of one of a kind pieces by a skilled Crayola artist.
Questions to answer that keep me thinking all the time... such as:

If God has everything anyway, why do we tithe?
Have you ever lied to me, Mom?
Why do some people not want their babies?
Are you old, Mom?

Looking at that sweet face every night after her eyes are closed.
Hearing about her escapades in dreamland on the way to school.
How she is always so happy to see me when I pick her up everyday.
The wave that hits me every now and then that makes me say, "I'm not just A mom, I'm HER mom!"
Knowing that while many people love my daughter, I loved her first. I was her first home... I knew her, even if just for a few brief moments, before her daddy even knew she was there.
Hearing her read at night.
Seeing her make new friends.
Eating ice cream with her.
Her sitting on the counter next to me while I cook, chatting my ear off.
Knowing that she was created for God's affection, and seeing that she openly receives that affection, even at this young age.
Being the one who led her to Jesus, in our van, going down the road. *sigh*
How her heart breaks for people who are handicapped, picked on, and left out.
The song in her heart and on her lips all the time.
The fact that she's still at the age where she's "never going to get married."
Weeds given to me as prized flowers.
A letter that says, "You bes mom, love abi."

I know that at some point, my happy place will disappear. It always does, doesn't it? There will be drama again... there will be irritation and shortcomings on her part, and especially on mine. But one thing is for sure. I am blessed to mother this little one. I was chosen to be her guide... her role model... her safe place.

I may need to pull this list back out soon and remind myself of all of the above.

Make a list today... You might need it tomorrow.

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