Monday, April 5, 2010
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????
Can I rant? Who am I asking? This is my blog!!! Of course I can.
Listen. Every once in a while, I see children whose situations break my heart into pieces. Of course, it's a given that some of those situations would be obvious ones, like children with handicaps or terminal illnesses.
But what I'm talking about in particular are kids whose parents are, how shall I say this diplomatically... clueless. Yep, that's a good way to say what I'm really thinking. Let's move on.
Well, today is one of those ranting days. Could be that it's Monday... but it could be that every so often, I need to purge my system... release pent up frustrations. But before I do, let me clarify this. I AM NOT SAYING I AM A PERFECT PARENT. (Lord knows I'm far from it.) I AM NOT SAYING I AM THE ONLY MOM WITH A BRAIN ON THIS PLANET. (Though sometimes I do feel like I'm becoming part of a minority.) AND I SURELY AM NOT SAYING I HAVE NO ROOM TO GROW. (Part of this blog is me actually documenting my successes AND failures as a parent.)
Now that we have that out of the way, I'll start a list called:
ARE YOU KIDDING ME Moments.
1. When a teenage girl is dressed like she is working in the red light district of Amsterdam, with her parents knowledge.
2. When her parents say, "I can't do anything about it!" ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Strangely, MY parents always found a way to get us to do WHATEVER they were expecting of us. And let me tell ya, we were SUPER strong willed girls!
3. But worse still... when her MOTHER dresses like that! You're their MOM. Not a Barbie. Not a Bratz doll. And CERTAINLY not her peer!!! If you're over 25, please dress like you are.
4. When a child is having a full blown tantrum in a restaurant and everyone around them is having to suffer for the parents' lack of common sense. In restaurants, there are bathrooms. In bathrooms, there are stalls. USE THEM!
5. When a child says, "I want..." and the parent bee-lines to the store to make his wish come true. Um, yeeeeeah. Set them up for REAL life... because EVERYONE knows you always get what you want in life!!!! (sarcasm is my second language.)
6. When parents don't investigate movies before their children and teenagers watch them. SERIOUSLY? Just because something is rated PG-13 doesn't mean it's appropriate for a 15 year old! And PLEASE... understand that Chucky is not a movie about a baby doll! www.fotf.org has a great resource called Plugged In that we use to screen EVERY movie for its content prior to letting the most valuable thing in our lives watch them. Just sayin.
7. We won't even go into the making them go to church thing. See my previous blog.
8. And about kids calling adults by their first names.
9. Parents who say lovely things like, "Shut up before I slap your *$ face," ESPECIALLY in public. (Not that it's EVER ok... but the look of humiliation on that child's face when they realize everyone in Wal-Mart is hearing this is unbearable to my heart.)
10. When kids completely flake out as teenagers, but SOMEHOW, it's the church's fault, the school system's fault, or the government's fault.
11. When parents demand apologies FROM their children but never offer them TO their children.
12. When children are underappreciated, undervalued, and underloved. Period.
Ok, ok. I'll settle down now. I feel better.
I know no one is perfect. And on any given day, you might see me and add me to YOUR list. But one thing's for sure. If I can keep myself open to correction from parents I admire, if I can admit my failures and shortcomings... if I can be open-minded and an eager student, I can keep from getting sucked into cycles of hurt and pain, and I can certainly shield Abi from destruction. But I have to remember that I am the parent. SHE is depending on ME to lead her correctly.
Whew. That's heavy. But His grace is sufficient. And thank God, His mercy is too.